Dear wool-blend tights from J. Crew,
You would be warm and cozy through the winter, and you would keep my legs toasty during frigid bike rides to campus. You are also incredibly chic, and come in so many beautiful colors that would go perfectly with all the summer dresses I plan to winterize this season. I promise I will take good care of you and not get too much chain grease on you.
Please come to my house for a visit?